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drwho222
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18 Aug 2017, 1:00 pm

Anyone else here HATE hearing this? Seems that no matter how I am really feeling, I almost always come off to NTs as at best very serious and at worst angry, unhappy, upset, etc.



TheSilentOne
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18 Aug 2017, 1:09 pm

People tell me this all of the time too. It upsets me.


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soloha
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18 Aug 2017, 1:18 pm

Yup. It's a really stupid thing to say. How would they feel if someone told them they should alter their facial expressions to suit other people? Oh wait. They do.



Wolfram87
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18 Aug 2017, 1:23 pm

Anyone telling me this probably hasn't seen me smile...


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drwho222
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18 Aug 2017, 1:28 pm

TheSilentOne wrote:
People tell me this all of the time too. It upsets me.


Is that you with John Barrowman? If so he is gay and taken LOL. And UR HOT.



drwho222
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18 Aug 2017, 1:34 pm

soloha wrote:
Yup. It's a really stupid thing to say. How would they feel if someone told them they should alter their facial expressions to suit other people? Oh wait. They do.


Its the NT need for conformity and group agreement IMO. Smiling shows you approve.

Hitler may have been an Aspie. At the least I don't think he was NT. But no one other than NTs would ever give a guy like him such massive support. Same for Trump.



kraftiekortie
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18 Aug 2017, 1:50 pm

You folks are not going to like this LOL

A smile uses less muscles than a frown, and I believe it might prevent headaches, too.

I am one of those who like it when people smile. But I never say to someone that he/she should "smile more."

It could be said to be an attempt at "social conformity" (by those imploring someone to "smile more").



jrjones9933
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18 Aug 2017, 1:55 pm

As annoying as people find it (and we have other long threads on this topic), they have a point. You can often get what you want more easily with a smile.


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kitesandtrainsandcats
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18 Aug 2017, 5:03 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
A smile uses less muscles than a frown,
That turns out to be not provable either way.
Quote:
There are 43 muscles in the face, most of which are controlled by the seventh cranial nerve (also known as the facial nerve). This nerve exits the cerebral cortex and emerges from your skull just in front of your ears. It then splits into five primary branches: temporal, zygomatic, buccal, mandibular and cervical. These branches reach different areas of the face and enervate muscles that allow the face to twist and contort into a variety of expressions.

However, nobody has really come up with a definitive number for how many muscles it takes to smile or frown -- one person's smile is another person's smirk. Also, not everyone has the same number of facial muscles; some have more, enabling a wider range of expression, while some people actually have 40 percent fewer [source: Devlin].

The truth is that people smile -- and frown -- differently, even when presented with similar stimuli. There is an even wider range of variety when one begins using different expressive muscles for the eyes, mouth, nose and forehead.
http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/i ... -smile.htm

Quote:
A long time ago I heard the adage that it takes something like 43 muscles to frown but only 17 muscles to smile, ergo, we should just smile because it's easier. It wasn't until my first anatomy class in college that I realized these numbers couldn't possibly be right. As far as I can tell, there are only about 36 named muscles of facial expression, and they're not all involved in smiling and frowning. Here they are in alphabetical order
...
So which ones are responsible for smiling and/or frowning? I could hazard a guess, but I'll defer to Dr. David Song, a plastic surgeon and Associate Professor at the University of Chicago Hospitals, who was interviewed for a Straight Dope article: Does it take fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown? Counting only the muscles that make significant contributions, he concludes that smiling takes one more muscle than frowning (12 vs. 11).

http://anatomynotes.blogspot.com/2006/0 ... frown.html

Quote:
... with the aid of David H. Song, MD, FACS, plastic surgeon and assistant professor at the University of Chicago Hospitals. Song, among other things, reconstructs faces — in short, he ought to know. My apologies if this list seems obsessive, but we're going to settle this once and for all. Caveat: Deciding which of the 53 facial muscles are important in smiling or frowning is a bit arbitrary — many make only minor contributions, and depending on the intensity of the expression may not be involved at all.

http://www.straightdope.com/columns/rea ... s-to-frown


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Last edited by kitesandtrainsandcats on 18 Aug 2017, 5:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

kraftiekortie
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18 Aug 2017, 5:04 pm

Learn something new every day.....

Still, when everything is considered in every light, it's better to smile than to frown.



oddnumberedcat
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18 Aug 2017, 8:47 pm

I have resting sad face (or resting angry face, depending on who you ask). People constantly tell me I look either upset when I'm not engaged in conversation (although I'm animated when I talk).

I don't really care when people tell me to smile or not, but it is a little too bad that people think I'm upset when I'm not. People have told me often I don't look very approachable, and it takes them time to realize that's just my default facial expression and I'm not going to bite their head off if they talk to me.



StampySquiddyFan
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18 Aug 2017, 8:59 pm

My face can be really blank in a lot of situations, and I hate it when people point this out. One of my teachers last year said, "I don't know how to read you." Join the club, teacher! Nobody does :D !


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Evil_Chuck
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18 Aug 2017, 10:22 pm

Why do other people want us to fake happiness?


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Edna3362
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18 Aug 2017, 10:36 pm

Think of it as an accommodation signaling that you're approachable and not annoyed or about to snap according to NTs' instincts. :| And it pleases one's eyes...

Of course, this isn't always true. More like one had to smile at the right time and place, expects to know when and where to and when and where not to.
And somewhere in other places in the world, smiling is outright inappropriate. Sometimes signaling insincerity. And is discouraged.

Then there's the correct way of smiling. :x To be not looking creepy or what.


I smile a lot because I'm happy or there's something funny going on as I would. Not too overwhelming, not too mildly or boring -- but juuust right amount of said emotional energy. :lol:
Not because someone told me to or that I ought to. :x


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Claradoon
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19 Aug 2017, 2:38 am

I took up smiling last year. Guess what. It's powerful. It changes how people treat you, how they esteem you. And it can stop an argument cold.

So, of course, having explored the reaches of a smile and learned to do it almost automatically, all my teeth fell out. I'm serious! So now I have to be very careful not to smile, which I forget, and I think I've been freaking people out. Still, I might get some new teeth maybe by the end of year, and I will then go back to being a smiling lady.

Promises, promises.



IstominFan
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19 Aug 2017, 9:27 am

A forced smile is actually just a grimace. There is a vast difference. A true smile signifies joy. A grimace is a sign of pain.